transformation.

I’m not one for New Year’s resolutions. In my opinion, they’re rather silly. If you want to make a change in yourself, then it’s best to do it whatever day at whatever time. A new year means nothing.

Lately, as I look at myself in the mirror and contemplate who I am, I’ve come to the conclusion that there are things I need to change about myself in order to become a better person. It may seem that I’m out for pity, or for needed compliments to help me feel better about who I currently am, but I can confidently say I don’t care what anybody thinks about my newfound wanted change.

I just know one thing. I’m not as happy as I should be. I need a happier attitude. I want to feel more confident about the people I surround myself with. I need to be more independent and stop depending on certain people in my life.

I’m trying to find the balance of strength and benevolence. I don’t want to be known as the girl who is alone because she’s too hard on herself and others; in turn, I don’t want to be the girl known for continuously getting her feelings hurt because she let’s any and everyone in. I need to be more understanding of people’s situations and realize that not everyone is as blessed as me. I have to understand that not everyone has good in them, and that the devil inside people is what can’t be trusted.

I refuse to be defeated by this little thing we call life. I want to conquer it, work in harmony with it. The simple fact is we’re not given all the time in the world, so why not work with what we have and make the best of it?

Peace. Love. Happy 2011.